November 14, 2008 at 11:52 pm 8 comments

There it happened again. Another nightmare.

My nightmares were usually horror enough to wake me up panting in darkness. I will need to sit on my bed, to let my conscious tell me that I am still in my room. Sometimes I will not be convinced enough until I switch on the light and have a careful look around my room. Nightmares, sometimes, can be very tricky. You thought you had wake up but the monster will again sprang out from the darkness for the second time, before it eventually wakes you up for real.

My classic nightmare scenes usually consists of being chased by monster, or door failed to shut properly whenever there is a monster behind it, or forgot to bring my homework to school, or failed in my exam, or worst among all, forgot to attend an exam. Funny it may sound but each have the potential to give me heart attack.

Yet, these recent nightmares were not as horror enough to wake me up from my sleep. Horror, but not too horror. I can even hardly recall what it was after I woke up. However, it always left something behind to make me feel frighten and restless for no particular reason. What should I call it then? Maybe ‘unpleasant dream’ will be a good name for it.

It just haunts me. I can see myself in few different scenes, doing related or sometimes unrelated things, with a crowd of people I had never met. Better still, in certain occasion, those whom I had not kept in touch for ages will appear before me. As messy as a scrambled egg it was, so did with the feeling aftermath. Confused, sober and upset, not necessary in the order.

Suppose that will be a very entertaining dream, I told myself, meeting new people or at times keep in touch with people whom I had long forgotten. However something deep inside my heart told me it was not. Yes, not at all. I could feel that I was restless. The voice inside my head told me so. Restless soul always generates restless dreams.

The voice in my head always knew myself better than me. The voice, though, is just like another version of Microsoft Windows Help and Support page. It never actually helps to solve your computer’s blue screen problem, but it tells where to look at, though it was wrong most of the time.

It was almost correct, however, in this case. But knowing a problem yet unable to solve it is just as equivalent as to not knowing where the problem lies. So what is the problem? What is so big deal, to steal away my sleep and my peace? Nothing but just a simple fact that a friend of mine is going to Far Far Away. Nothing but just the fear that I will be little bit more lonely than before.

What can be done?

It could be lots easier if it was, like in one of those movies you ever watched, your lover was forced to get married with a villain. You can always enter the church on their wedding day with a loud kick on the door and save her before both of you finally lived happily ever after. That is what Disney always taught the kids. The problem is, no lover was involved here. Just a friend whom had left behind a number of foot prints in my heart.

Probably reading more good novels may help.

The eye of man hath not heard, the ear of man hath not seen, man’s hand is not able to taste, his tongue to conceive, nor his heart to report, what my dream was.

~William Shakespeare


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FATHER FORGETS by W. Livingston Larned Down With Cold

8 Comments Add your own

  • 1. le chat  |  January 14, 2009 at 4:10 pm

    I dreamed a lot too, and I used to remember most details of my dream when I woke up, and note them down in my “dreams diary”. But not until recent, I only can recalled what it was about roughly, the details gone.

    For me, dream is another life adventure, or a reflection of life, it conceals “another” you, or it reveals what is inside your deepest heart.

    And thank you for the quote! “Midsummer Night’s Dream”, my favourite.

  • 2. rhealk  |  January 14, 2009 at 4:45 pm

    Wow, you’re such an interesting person. You keep a dream diary!

    Haha, dream is like a portal to another world for me. It seems to keep resonance with the troubles I kept in my mind.

    Oh, the quote, haha, it’s nice. You read the play?

    I used to like literature when I was younger. Those classics have superb command of language and I used to copy those creative or meaningful or touching lines in a book. That was the good old days…

  • 3. le chat  |  January 14, 2009 at 7:36 pm

    I read the translated Chinese version of Shakespeare. Shakespeare’s English is too deep for me. So my heart leaped when I read your quote. The power of language in its original form, sometimes, or most of the times, cannot be delivered after translated. 🙂 I still copy down the sentences which touched my heart until now.

    About my dream diary, some people said it’s abnormal. But I read in your previous blog entry: People with higher IQ will dream more… haha! I wonder, do they remember their dream?

  • 4. Jani  |  January 14, 2009 at 9:38 pm

    I have many weird dreams too
    hate those dreams that you cant wake up from it
    again and again and again you got shocked and woke up but you are still in dreams actually
    and even worse when you actually woke up and you are conscious but your mind is still captured in dreams and still unable to wake up
    that’s scary and horrible

  • 5. rhealk  |  January 14, 2009 at 10:37 pm

    le chat:
    Yes, the language is the most beautiful when it’s in the original form. Translation will usually alter the ‘feel’ of it. I just like Shakespeare’s work. So romantic, so elegant, so beautiful, so classy and so much feels!

    Dream, dream, dream
    When I feel blue in the night
    And I want you to hold me tight
    Whenever I want you, all I have to do is dream

    Haha, I like oldies and All I Have to do is Dream by Roy Orbison / Everly Brothers is one of my favourite.
    Not so sure if people with high IQ will remember their dream but for sure the kaki nombor will surely remember. They live to dream numbers and wake up to bet on it!
    Well, I think that’s special instead of abnormal 😛

  • 6. rhealk  |  January 14, 2009 at 10:43 pm

    You still have those weird dreams ar?
    A dozen of alarm clocks already hardly can wake you up… so boh pien lar, you’ll also can hardly wake up from your dream. Hmm. sounds quite logic… 😛
    Dream in dream in dream? Walau, you thought it’s kek lapis Sarawak ar? The most I had is two layer dream. Don’t tell me you got three layers… and usually those dreams with layers are never up to anything good…
    Ya, sometimes the dream is just too frightening or sad or heartbroken until still confused and blur blur after woke up. I hate the sad one… just make me cry even after I already woke up… kanasai!

  • 7. Jani  |  January 14, 2009 at 11:06 pm

    haha~ ya, i had those that made me cry too. at that moment you just feel it’s so real. especially those that your loved ones or those that around you passed away.

    erm, not recently, but during my undergrade times… Guess now I’m not so stressed eh? hhaha
    mine is often about being chased after by ppl who want to take my life or hurt me or catch me etc. :p

  • 8. rhealk  |  January 14, 2009 at 11:16 pm

    I hate the being chased one… the doors just can never shut or lock properly! ALWAYS!
    Glad I’m not having any of it anymore. Touch wood touch wood… cross fingers! I’m going to sleep soon!

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