Archive for December, 2009

Love and Hate

“I might ended up hating you”, she said.

“Isn’t that good? If you’re going to hate me, it will happen sooner or later. The trip will help you to know me faster”, I replied.

“I read that couples always ended up quarreling and broke up after return from an oversea holiday trip”.

“Are you sure? Hmmm…”.


What kind of love is that if it is really that fragile?

If the theory is true, there will be a party in April 2010. Either a “We loved each other more now” type of party or “Hey, I am free again” type of party.

Darling, are you frightened? Hahahaha~

December 12, 2009 at 6:50 am 2 comments

The Journey Back To The East

The morning was cold.

Using a motorcycle, at 5am, in the chilling temperature, we braved our way from his house in suburb of Sarikei to the King’s Inn in town.

It felt like Sibu 15 years ago. Cold. Very. Along the way I realised that cats in Sarikei are not good pedestrian. Few kitties rested unpeacefully on the road. What a mess.

Six fifteen a.m. and we headed to Sibu by bus. The sun rose slowly from the horizon, right in front of us, above the road. It seemed as if we were heading to the sun.

It was always in front of us. We were chasing and kept chasing it all along the way, though we never get any nearer to it. The distance became further instead.  A journey to the East? Haha!

Sitting at the front seat, I have all the privileged to enjoy the beautiful sunrise. At that moment, that was the most beautiful thing everyone can see. Of course, both the driver and me had the best view of it.

As we moved on, the bus overtook a number of cars and heavy vehicles. At one time, the bus tailed behind an old Honda Civic. A brown, slow and rusty good old car.

At the big rear screen of the car was a little girl in pyjamas. A lovely little girl. She was looking out from the car, as if she was counting the number of the cars which overtook them.

I can see her clearly. Oval face, two beautiful little eyes and short hair.

Resting her head on her both palms, she enjoyed looking at the huge bus following behind them.

Our eyes met. She showed me her both palms. Then she hided her face behind them for a while. Just before the bus overtook them, she showed her face again. And that’s another most beautiful thing which only seen by me. And perhaps the driver too.

I did not know why but looking at her made me felt at peace. The worries and the restless voices in the head had gone quiet. Calm. Silent. The only sound I can hear was the roaring engine of the bus, my own heart beat and the sound of the morning. I feel hope. I feel future. I feel life. It was a magical moment.

A magical moment. Why? Perhaps she reminded me of her. Someone who loved me more than myself do. In this world, there are only two ladies who love me more than myself. One is my mum and another is her. And now I wonder, if she did that too when she was small; looking out from the rear window of the car and communicate with strangers with her own language.

I love you, my dear. ❤

December 11, 2009 at 9:31 am 4 comments

Senior Baby Tooth

“Wow, it is the oldest tooth in my mouth”, I told her excitedly.

“Yes, so you must take good care of it”, she replied.

“Haha. The senior baby tooth”.


I woke up with an itch on my upper left tooth. With a torch light, I looked at the itchy tooth. Obviously there is a small hole on it.

That means I have to break my life time record – my first dentist visit after I left secondary school.

“Did you see the hole on it?”, the dentist asked, giving me a small mirror and show me the hole on my tooth.

“Uhum…”, I replied.

“It is a baby tooth. You still have a baby tooth”.

“Baby tooth…”, I repeated in disbelieve.

“Do I need to remove it, since it had hole in it?”

“We’ll see. We try not to remove it. Otherwise you’ll have one tooth less.”

“Won’t the primary tooth grow out after the baby tooth is removed?”

“No. In certain case, the primary tooth is absent. So the baby tooth remains.”

After few minutes, the drilling starts. I wonder what makes people so anxious when they see a dentist. Is it due to the drilling sensation inside their mouth? Somehow I rather enjoyed it when the dentist is scrapping my teeth with the hook-like tool. Probably that’s how the crocodile feels when it open its mouth for the birds to clean its teeth.

Fifteen minutes and my baby tooth is safe again.

December 9, 2009 at 9:01 am 4 comments



How much can you love someone?

Do you love her just because she is beautiful? Rich?

Will the feeling change when she turns ugly? Or diagnosed with a terminal disease? Will you still willing to love her as you did before?

I love you. A three letter words can be easily uttered by anyone to anybody.

You were just about to say your wow “I will love and cherish you, with all my heart. Honor and respect you, with all my strength. I will remain faithful, in sickness and in health, whether rich or poor, in sorrow and in joy. This I promise, for as long as my life shall last” when the phone rang.

Your family answered and the voice over the phone said “This is Dr. ZYX calling from Hospital DEF. We have urgent news for Mr. Groom to be.”

Your family walked up the church aisle to your side. They whispered that there’s an important call for you.

“Ask them to call back”, you whispered back.

“Its a call from Dr. ZYX. He said its urgent.”

You answered the call.

“I am sorry for disturbing you, Groom-to-be but we had this utmost news for you. We suspected Bride-to-be to have ABC terminal disease. We would like her to come back for a detailed examination.”

You hung up.

You felt as if the room had turned quiet, though in fact everyone is still whispering to each other and the birds still chirping happily outside. Your heart skipped a few beats. Your shoulder felt heavy. Your vision blurred. You wished that this is just a story you read from

What is the first thing that you will worring about?

And what will you do?

And what if the phone call is for you and the victim is you? Will you stop the marriage for her sake, not to leave her spend another half a century alone after you left?

Will you, still utter the wow?

Will you?


She always tell me “C’est la vie”. Yes my dear, that’s life.

I think I will always say, be it one day, one year, or 100 years, I will still love you. With all my life.

December 2, 2009 at 11:30 am 2 comments

December 2009
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